Repentance

I had to repent this morning.  Like, seriously apologize to God.  For weeks I had been so upset about the chaos that is the presidential election this year.  My heart kept getting sadder and sadder as the days went on.  And then yesterday happened.  I started the day off just as upset.  There was such a tight feeling in my gut as I voted and as I left.  It took all I had not to stop my car and get out and pull the Trump sign that I saw down.  The more Dustin and I talked yesterday and read things, the more frustrated I got.  And then last night, Caleb and Sarah came over.  We began talking eschatology and the many different ways this could all play out for our country.  And Caleb talked of every great Christian revival happening in the midst of people vehemently opposed to it.  And it hit me.  Full force.  What a beautiful time could be upon us.  If those of us who have had our eyes opened widely by this time begin seeing things as God sees them and not with our own eyes, we could really do some amazing things for the kingdom.  If we stop assuming that everyone around us is saved just because they grew up in the bible belt or because they go to church.  Even people who claim it could be deceiving you and themselves.  Sarah pointed out how clearly the bible says "Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. 14For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few."  in Matthew 7.  It also says in that same chapter "21“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven. 22On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’ 23And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’"  These can be good people.  Good will NOT get anyone into Heaven.  The sweet blood of Jesus Christ is ALL that will do it.  If we start going around trying to REALLY live it out.  If we become as deeply burdened about lost people as we should be.  This time upon us could be amazing!!  I had to repent of my negative attitude about the times.  I had to repent that even though I knew God was sovereign and that none of this is a surprise to him, I had let my emotions take over me and control my thoughts.  He has told me that I will have Joy and Peace in the midst of trouble.  I am not saying I should not be broken over sin, but I had to start with my own.  I had to start with my attitude and not trusting Him.  And then I had to apologize to Him for not being burdened enough for people.  I had to plead for His eyes and I had to plead to not just be content to sit on the sidelines.  I am still having to plead that He let my life look VERY different from "normal" because I know everything about Jesus isn't normal.  I am still pleading with him that I have a deep desire that every person I meet know that Jesus owns me and that it is the best thing in the world and they should let Jesus ransom them as well.  No matter what God is working everything to the good of those that love him.  He told me that in Romans 8.  He is true to His Word, but I have to make sure I am living out that part that says "for all those that love the Lord."  If I miss that part, then I miss it all.  I am asking every day to love Jesus more.  To have a deeper heart and head knowledge of grace and love and forgiveness and to share it with others.  I will not let my heart and head go back to the sadness I felt the past few weeks.  I do not like it, and I don't believe I should.  But I will spend everyday trying to be a part of the plan God has for this time in history.