I sat down to type this blog and I have no idea what I am writing about. Nope, no idea. Just really felt like I needed to type but I have no direction for it. I guess it will just be an update blog and we will see where it goes.
We have a house full of girls, ages 9,10,11,12,13,14,and 16. AND IT IS WONDERFUL. Our house is flowing pretty smoothly right now and they are all getting along relatively well. That is not saying there are not bumps in the road, but I don't believe there are every not any bumps. Foster care is not easy. Learning to decipher when to put my foot down and when to extend grace will forever be a struggle. BUT It's like I told my foster class last week, "I never want to stand before God Almighty and have Him say that I did not give enough grace. I had much rather him say that I gave too much." I don't believe He will say I gave too much. I don't believe there is such a thing. I have been given abundant grace and I want to extend that to my kids and every one else that I come into contact with. That is a daily battle. I fail so miserably at it. So miserably. But I want to be better at it every day.
I also got told this week that I am the friend "nobody wants to have but everyone needs." I used to speak my mind without ever praying over it first and therefore it usually came out prideful, hurtful, and just plain wrong. As I have grown in my walk with the Lord, I have learned to pray over something long and hard before raising my voice(okay, I sometimes still blurt crap out and I always mess up when I do.). But, when I do it the right way, people are sometimes mad at first but they almost always see that it was said in love and it leads to open discussion and often times a change in them and in myself. I was a little hurt at first about the 'no one wants to have' part but the more I have thought it over(I thought it over long and hard because if I needed to change something, I wanted to), the young lady who said it to me meant it kindly. She actually sent me a card this week thanking me for being a source of accountability for her. So why do we not want friends that call us out? I think it's because we hate hearing we are wrong and it is just plain hard to change certain things in our lives. I have been blessed my whole life with a group of friends who just tell each other the brutal truth. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I think it is one of the reasons that we are still so close now. We never have to wonder what the others are thinking. We already have said it, discussed it, and are now making jokes about it. Mine and Dustin's relationship is the same way. We speak the truth to each other all the time. Mad, sad, disappointed, or whatever. We say it. I know that he loves me no matter what and that he is just trying to make me better. Open communication is probably a big reason why we really don't fight. We disagree often, but we don't fight. I am just trying to daily find a way to speak truth while making sure it is wrapped in love.
I guess the moral of today's blog is that if we don't have grace or love mixed with everything we do...it's worthless. Without Jesus, we can't have either of those things. So, without Jesus, it's all worthless.
"Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ" Phillipians 3:8
We have a house full of girls, ages 9,10,11,12,13,14,and 16. AND IT IS WONDERFUL. Our house is flowing pretty smoothly right now and they are all getting along relatively well. That is not saying there are not bumps in the road, but I don't believe there are every not any bumps. Foster care is not easy. Learning to decipher when to put my foot down and when to extend grace will forever be a struggle. BUT It's like I told my foster class last week, "I never want to stand before God Almighty and have Him say that I did not give enough grace. I had much rather him say that I gave too much." I don't believe He will say I gave too much. I don't believe there is such a thing. I have been given abundant grace and I want to extend that to my kids and every one else that I come into contact with. That is a daily battle. I fail so miserably at it. So miserably. But I want to be better at it every day.
I also got told this week that I am the friend "nobody wants to have but everyone needs." I used to speak my mind without ever praying over it first and therefore it usually came out prideful, hurtful, and just plain wrong. As I have grown in my walk with the Lord, I have learned to pray over something long and hard before raising my voice(okay, I sometimes still blurt crap out and I always mess up when I do.). But, when I do it the right way, people are sometimes mad at first but they almost always see that it was said in love and it leads to open discussion and often times a change in them and in myself. I was a little hurt at first about the 'no one wants to have' part but the more I have thought it over(I thought it over long and hard because if I needed to change something, I wanted to), the young lady who said it to me meant it kindly. She actually sent me a card this week thanking me for being a source of accountability for her. So why do we not want friends that call us out? I think it's because we hate hearing we are wrong and it is just plain hard to change certain things in our lives. I have been blessed my whole life with a group of friends who just tell each other the brutal truth. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I think it is one of the reasons that we are still so close now. We never have to wonder what the others are thinking. We already have said it, discussed it, and are now making jokes about it. Mine and Dustin's relationship is the same way. We speak the truth to each other all the time. Mad, sad, disappointed, or whatever. We say it. I know that he loves me no matter what and that he is just trying to make me better. Open communication is probably a big reason why we really don't fight. We disagree often, but we don't fight. I am just trying to daily find a way to speak truth while making sure it is wrapped in love.
I guess the moral of today's blog is that if we don't have grace or love mixed with everything we do...it's worthless. Without Jesus, we can't have either of those things. So, without Jesus, it's all worthless.
"Yes, everything else is worthless when compared with the infinite value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have discarded everything else, counting it all as garbage, so that I could gain Christ" Phillipians 3:8
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