First, let me start off by thanking all of you who prayed for me to get the job at the alternative school. I did not get it. I was slightly bummed but I know I am just waiting on God. This whole process I have been trying to see what all God is wanting to teach me through this. I am far from mature in my Christian walk but I want to strive to get there. I believe every day is an opportunity and ,although I do not always take advantage of it, I should see what He wants me to learn. Well I went for a walk Friday afternoon after I learned I did not get the job. God had several things to teach me, but some of that is for a later story maybe..
One of those things He revealed to me had to do with maybe one reason why I do not have a job yet. My ipod was dead that day(God had that planned so that it was just me, Him, and the crazy thoughts in my head.) and my Frazzled Female bible study I am doing encourages us to take God with us in everything we are doing. Riding in the car, cooking, shopping, and in my case then, walking my mile and a half. So off I go and I am beginning to talk to God about that I am bummed and discouraged BUT I do know that He has a plan and that part of it makes me excited and that for Him to just to give me patience and so on...and out of nowhere I had a revelation. Don't you just love when that happens?!? Well I have struggled a long time off and on with my salvation. I was saved at such a young age that as I got older I wanted to examine myself and make sure I meant it. I believe Satan knew it was my weak point and he used it at His every advantage. I believe doubt in our faith and self doubt are two of Satans most powerful weapons. And he hit me with them every chance he got. I would even begin wondering did I say the right words, understand my sinfulness enough, did I really "get" it all. And everytime God would say "Right words are not important, faith is." "No, you did not understand your sinfullness all the way, you never will, but you understood it enough to know that you put Christ on that cross." "You won't ever "get" me completely..That is the beauty of me being God. I slowly reveal myself to you as you grow and when you get to Heaven you will understand me even more." But still sometimes I would feel weak in my faith and have this all to familiar converstation with Him. Well on my walk, it hit me. I know that salvation is about faith. That is it. No works, words or anything else. Just FAITH. And through all this, I have had faith. Maybe some of this was to teach me that I do rely solely on Christ. I have not doubted His sovereignty in this at all. (Oh, I fail Him often and in many ways.) But somehow with this, I have simply said "Ok, God, wherever, whenever, It is all up to you." I have been bummed and WANTED a job badly BUT I have never let go of the fact that God is at work. I know that I followed His plan for me when I became a teacher and that this is all part of His plan. And He revealed to me then that I had demonstrated my faith in Him by that. Everytime Satan attacks me I now bodly say GET OFF OF ME! MY FAITH IS IN JESUS CHRIST ALONE AND YOU CANNOT TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME! God is so good at teaching us things and I thank Him for being the best example of a Teacher that I could ever follow.
The second lesson I learned was last night...
We helped take some of the youth to the Shane and Shane concert at Capshaw Baptist. Bethany Dillon opened for them. She talked about being a "doer" and a certain sermon she had heard about waiting on God. That is me. I am a doer. I think I can fix something, help you, get it done, and I don't want to wait on other people. I will just make the decision, be the leader of the project, and do most of the work. BUT how often is that such a WRONG response... Sometimes God calls us to just WAIT. It hit me like a ton of bricks. God is calling me to wait. There is nothing I can really do to get a teaching job. I apply for all the ones that come open in my area, and from what I have been told, do a pretty good job in my interviews. God just hasn't opened up the job that is mine yet. It is coming...I know it is...I am just going to wait on Him. He will take care of me and put me where He so chooses. I will just wait as patiently as I can. The song she wrote has this line, and I think I have found a new motto "You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I can do." Amen.
One of those things He revealed to me had to do with maybe one reason why I do not have a job yet. My ipod was dead that day(God had that planned so that it was just me, Him, and the crazy thoughts in my head.) and my Frazzled Female bible study I am doing encourages us to take God with us in everything we are doing. Riding in the car, cooking, shopping, and in my case then, walking my mile and a half. So off I go and I am beginning to talk to God about that I am bummed and discouraged BUT I do know that He has a plan and that part of it makes me excited and that for Him to just to give me patience and so on...and out of nowhere I had a revelation. Don't you just love when that happens?!? Well I have struggled a long time off and on with my salvation. I was saved at such a young age that as I got older I wanted to examine myself and make sure I meant it. I believe Satan knew it was my weak point and he used it at His every advantage. I believe doubt in our faith and self doubt are two of Satans most powerful weapons. And he hit me with them every chance he got. I would even begin wondering did I say the right words, understand my sinfulness enough, did I really "get" it all. And everytime God would say "Right words are not important, faith is." "No, you did not understand your sinfullness all the way, you never will, but you understood it enough to know that you put Christ on that cross." "You won't ever "get" me completely..That is the beauty of me being God. I slowly reveal myself to you as you grow and when you get to Heaven you will understand me even more." But still sometimes I would feel weak in my faith and have this all to familiar converstation with Him. Well on my walk, it hit me. I know that salvation is about faith. That is it. No works, words or anything else. Just FAITH. And through all this, I have had faith. Maybe some of this was to teach me that I do rely solely on Christ. I have not doubted His sovereignty in this at all. (Oh, I fail Him often and in many ways.) But somehow with this, I have simply said "Ok, God, wherever, whenever, It is all up to you." I have been bummed and WANTED a job badly BUT I have never let go of the fact that God is at work. I know that I followed His plan for me when I became a teacher and that this is all part of His plan. And He revealed to me then that I had demonstrated my faith in Him by that. Everytime Satan attacks me I now bodly say GET OFF OF ME! MY FAITH IS IN JESUS CHRIST ALONE AND YOU CANNOT TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME! God is so good at teaching us things and I thank Him for being the best example of a Teacher that I could ever follow.
The second lesson I learned was last night...
We helped take some of the youth to the Shane and Shane concert at Capshaw Baptist. Bethany Dillon opened for them. She talked about being a "doer" and a certain sermon she had heard about waiting on God. That is me. I am a doer. I think I can fix something, help you, get it done, and I don't want to wait on other people. I will just make the decision, be the leader of the project, and do most of the work. BUT how often is that such a WRONG response... Sometimes God calls us to just WAIT. It hit me like a ton of bricks. God is calling me to wait. There is nothing I can really do to get a teaching job. I apply for all the ones that come open in my area, and from what I have been told, do a pretty good job in my interviews. God just hasn't opened up the job that is mine yet. It is coming...I know it is...I am just going to wait on Him. He will take care of me and put me where He so chooses. I will just wait as patiently as I can. The song she wrote has this line, and I think I have found a new motto "You can do more in my waiting than in my doing I can do." Amen.
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