Forgiveness. This is today’s topic because I got handed it today and got to extend it to someone. I have struggled, and still do, with holding grudges. If you offend me or do wrong by me or someone I care about I tend to just write you off. I have made a very strong effort to do better about this lately. I know that it is not a spiritually healthy trait or beneficial to anyone. Forgiving people or overlooking wrong doings is a great way to show Christ’s love to others. I have tried very hard with one case lately and it is still a project in the works. I don’t want to discuss it much because I don’t want to offend those involved. But I was in the wrong and have tried very hard to be kind to this person and I know that my efforts have been acknowledged and appreciated. That brings me to today:
A girl that I have had a rough background with tweeted a thought. For some reason, I wrote her to tell her I said a prayer for her. Our friendship was rocky all along but for me it all blew up when I felt lied to over a situation. I may not have been or I may have been, it doesn’t matter. I felt I was, and I that was when my ugly anger reared its head. I just wrote her off. I have said bad things about her and sure enough thought bad things about her. Just not nice at all. I was far from perfect in the friendship as well. Why did I write her this morning…no other explanation but it was a God thing. I really didn’t even think about it. Just picked up the phone and texted her. I guess it went along with my whole encouragement thing. I was stunned to get a long message back that included an apology and her admitting her hatred of me in the past too. She said she had prayed for a long time for forgiveness from me and had been scared to ask, but it was part of her New Year’s resolution. Man doesn’t God show up at unexpected times. I told her how I felt betrayed by her but that it was NO excuse for how I had treated her and that I gave her my forgiveness and asked for hers in return. We are both Christian young women who had been harboring terrible feelings that do nothing but weigh a heart down. We knew we were wrong but pride and other ugly characteristics had kept us from discussing it. Forgiveness is such a wonderful thing and even more wonderful when it comes unexpectedly. I do not tell this story so that people will think, “oh, how great of her.” I tell this story so that maybe it can encourage you to reach out to someone who you need to forgive. You may not be as lucky as I am and have somebody as willing to forgive or who asks for yours in return. BUT at the end of the day you can say you tried. I think once you extend that forgiveness the Holy Spirit will begin to work. If their forgiveness isn’t immediate continue to pray for them. God may be doing something in their life that you have NO idea about but you can be used by him to further His work. Maybe you aren’t at the point where you can ask for forgiveness. Pray about it. God will work on your heart if you ask him sincerely. Maybe you need to forgive someone else. Maybe they don’t even know they have offended you. Try to start a dialogue with them about it. You may be surprised. Maybe they had good intentions that you didn’t even consider. Or maybe they were just plain wrong and don’t know how to ask for forgiveness. Forgiveness is healing. I serve a God who is the ultimate forgiver. One of the best ways for me to show what he has done in my life is to extend that forgiveness to others. So get out there and put your faith to work. It probably won’t be easy but it will be freeing. And I promise you, both me and this other girl feel much better and are so happy we did it. So, here is a thank you to God for giving us the opportunity this morning and for being a God of forgiveness. Go and heal some relationships and I would love to hear your story of forgiveness. SO let me hear from you.
**”Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” –Ephesians 4:32
**”But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”- Matthew 6:15
**”Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”-Colossians 3:13
Did you write this just for me? Haha...I have to say forgiveness is a struggle with me as well. Once I get to the point of real anger, or feel betrayal then the huge grudge takes hold. One person in particular has been targeted for many, many years. This person has caused grief in my family and to me personally. They have made accusations about my intentions on certain situations and questioned decisions made when those were made with the best intentions possible...and were very difficult decisions to make in very difficult circumstances. I still pray about this almost daily. I don't want my feelings toward this person to jepordize my relationship with Christ; but I know that it can. To be given forgiveness we must be willing to give it. Deserved or not. I certainly did not deserve the sacrifice Jesus made for me--yet this sinful flesh often holds on to the grudge against this person. I can even justify it if you give me long enough!
ReplyDeleteI am sure this person probably feels that I have some responsiblity as well. I'm sure I probably do. I continue to search for ways to give (and maybe get) forgiveness. I am not there yet, but I know that God will lead me to a resolution. Thanks for sharing this one :) Keep it up!
When I was a senior in high school, I had a "run in" (for lack of a better term) with another girl. For YEARS...like 15!...if you asked me who my least favorite person in the whole world was, I would have probably said her and I'm sure she felt the same way.
ReplyDeleteWell, there never was an official moment that either of us apologized or made any kind of admission of guilt, but at some point over the past two years, we've actually ALMOST become friends. I should say we've become "friendly" on Facebook...she likes my statuses and I like hers... she comments on me and I comment on her. Other than both being Christians, I can't think of a SINGLE thing we have in common so we probably will never hang out socially, but I'm really happy that it seems we've buried the hatchet. I didn't even know it bothered me until we started "talking" and now I realize how relieved I am that I no longer can say "oh, I hate her!" or "she hates my guts".
That's my story!